Why this die-hard Samsung (and Android) fan may be going back to the iPad

(You could also subtitle this post "What I think Samsung needs to do to get their shit together.")

So I had an iPad mini, sold it, and went to the Galaxy Note 8 tablet, which I loved.  Perfect size, Android, Samsung- the perfect combination for me.  Until I broke the screen.  I could just pay to get the screen fixed, but being a gadget girl I like to buy new phones yearly, and new computers every couple of years, and I saw this as an opportunity to get something new.  Despite being a die-hard Samsung and Android fan I am seriously considering going back to the iPad mini, for several reasons.

1) Software updates.  I prefer Android to Apple's iOS hands down.  I love my widgets, multi-window capabilities (is that a Samsung only thing?), and more.  But what really sucks is how each phone manufacturer, and then even each mobile carrier dictates when a phone gets the newest update-- if at all.  So my Soror Brandi who has the same phone as I do, the awesome Galaxy S5, could get the next update weeks prior to me, or weeks later.  And someone with a different phone may not get it at all, even if their phone is a relatively new model.  I think this is an issue for a lot of Android users and may be the main thing that makes some of us leave.  Google needs to put its foot down and come up with a way for everyone to be able to get the new updates at the same time.  I understand that some older phones may not always be able to be updated, but for the phones who have the specifications necessary, everybody should get them, and there should be one release date.  This is something that apple is doing right.

2) Accessories! I'm an indecisive girl who loves to shop and loves to accessorize her gadgets.  I have two very colorful Otterbox cases for my Galaxy S5, and for the defender case I can buy different parts and mix and match and the idea of doing that makes my heart sing.  Let's face it, when looking for accessories, it may be easy to find exactly what you want (or even what you didn't even KNOW you wanted) for Apple products, or even for the more popular Samsung phones like the Note or S series phones.  But try to find an Otterbox in a cute color for a Galaxy Note 8 or Galaxy S 8.4 and things get interesting.

In my head I have worked out that the reason for this is because Samsung just has too many damn products!  If you count size variations Samsung has released more than 5 tablets in the past 12 months.  It would be easier for accessory makers to provide a wider variety of styles and colors if they were working with 2 tablets instead of 10.  What I think Samsung should do instead of trying to make 92098347 versions of everything is remember that quality counts more than quantity.  Keep the Note and S phone lines, and maybe have one less expensive entry-level option, keep the Galaxy S tablet line because the screens are awesome and then throw in the S pen to give it the capabilities of the Note tablets, and again maybe offer one less expensive option.  With out all those devices to keep up with maybe accessory makers can offer more choices for Samsung (and other companies with Android phones but let's face it, I currently don't care about those) devices.

3)  Variety.  This reason isn't anything Samsung or anyone else can change, just a personal quirk.  As much as I love Android and Samsung, currently I have most of the same apps on my phone and my tablet.  It seems as though I have my home screens set up in a similar matter on both devices.  It makes it feel like a giant version of my phone and I kind of just want something different.  I couldn't ever go to the iPhone but I think going back to the iPad mini may give me the change I need.

Wait! I was about to publish this post when I thought of a 4th reason.  Bloatware! Even iOS devices come with some apps pre-installed.  It's generally stuff folks really use-- Facetime, iTunes, etc.  Well Android manufacturers tend to take that way too far.  There are apps on my phone and tablet that I never use like Flipboard, but unless I choose to root the device (Apple users-- think jailbreak) I can't delete them.  Being able to hide them on my S5 has made things a little easier but they are just sitting there taking up space on my phone. At some point these manufacturers have got to stop this!


So as I get ready to replace my broken tablet, this gadget girl may be switching back to the ipad.

So So SO Funkdafied

Can we take a minute and talk about grown ass women with bad hygiene? Like seriously, why is this even a thing?  We all had the various health class talks about deodorant and body odor, right? I just don't get it.  There is no reason for a woman to be walking around smelling like a fermented onion armpit and asshole sandwich.  Someone who just got done running 10 miles? Might stink.  Someone who was just wrestling a wild boar? Might stink.  But what about doing nothing makes you stink? It shouldn't!  What is going on in your life that you smell like this?  You ever have a person pass by you and you automatically envision a green cloud following them?  I'm talking about a smell so bad it lingers for several several SEVERAL minutes after the offender has left, and you're nauseated and just want to puke on everything?  Like I feel like I should call these types of folks Pepe Le Eww.  Or Funkmaster Flex.  I hope women like this are single because I feel like they have the toxic snatch like Zoe from AHS Coven.  Let them panties drop and so does your date.

Bitches walking around smelling like they need an autopsy.  I feel like only a doctor can fix this type of funk, and maybe a bath in bleach and a dusting with baking soda.  I just don't get it.  I have so many questions.  Can you not smell yourself? Do you not bathe? Are you trying to use fancy soap? Because I think Maybe just a bar of the original orange Dial is what you may need.  Are you anti-deodorant? Trying to use the fancy natural stuff? Go get some Secret Clinical Strength, for the sake of us all.  I'm just appalled that a woman can smell like that.  And if your body smells like this what is your house like?  Maybe this is what watching Hoarders in smell-o-vision would be like, and I don't like it.  I just pray that the cilia in my nasal cavity and upper respiratory tract are not damaged so they can continue to do their job.

Single (But not Bitter) on Valentine's Day...

You know what I'm tired of? (Excuse that preposition at the end of the sentence) I'm tired of people assuming that ever single woman is bitter about love... or just bitter in general.  (Why single men aren't thought of in this manner is probably another issue for later.)  I don't talk about it much but you know what? I LOVE love.  Have I been hurt? Hell yes.  Was I mad about it? Damn straight.  But in the end I've always been that hopeless romantic who believed that "the one" was out there for me.  I see my cousin my bestie my sister, Delisha, preparing for her upcoming wedding day and I am happy that she found someone to love her.  I look at my parents and their nearly 43 years of marriage and I long for a relationship that can stand the test of time.  I have many cousins and sorors and friends who have found love and I love it!  I know that God has a man out there for me who will love me the way I deserve to be loved and I can't wait.  But for now I'm single, and to some people that automatically equals bitter.  Would I like someone special to give me flowers and a gift and do something super romantic for me? Of course I would.  But at the end of the day I'll be alone tonight, but I'm not bitter about it, because my favorite person to spend time with is Me.  Maybe next year I'll be able to annoy my Facebook, Instagram and Twitter friends with my 27345098.7 posts about my "bae."  But until then Happy Valentine's Day to the rest of y'all but especially my single folks.

Touch My Body

Something I heard today made me start having all these weird random thoughts and I really just need to get it all out of my head.  So there are people out there in the world who don't like to be touched.  Some are "germaphobes" and others just don't like for other humans to make physical contact with them.  Okay, got it.  But what always pops into my head when I hear about people like this is sex.  Yep.  Sex.  Often these people are single, but not always.  Sometimes they are married or in relationships and I just wonder how sex works for them.  If you don't like to be touched does that mean that you don't like sex? Do you just lay there like a ragdoll watching the clock tic by, hoping that it's over soon? And what about foreplay and kissing?  I know that physical intimacy isn't the only type of intimacy, but is the sex just cold, awkward robotic jerking or does your disdain for physical contact go away when it's time to get down?  And I guess cuddling and spooning is out of the question? Okay.  That's it, I'm done.  I'm just thinking "out loud."  

Farewell

Today is the last day of my 20s.  Bittersweet really.  Since 2003 I've had my biggest heartbreaks, met some awesome people, had some big losses.  I've grown, I've changed, I've matured.  I've gained weight.  I've cried many tears and had many laughs.  But as scary as the BIG 3-0 feels, I definitely wouldn't go back to the me I was 10 years ago.

So here it is. The last blog post of my 20s.  Hoping that my 30s brings lots of fun, good memories, laughs, and a man (lol but seriously though).  I don't have any big profound statement, I'm just ready to say goodbye to this decade and get on with the rest of my life.

Shit That's Offensive 101: Blackface

It happens every year at Halloween.  A white person gets the idea that they want to be a black character from a movie, tv show, etc.  It never occurs to them that people would get who they are without panting themselves black or dark brown.

If you want history about blackface click here:  Blackface on Wiki  Long story short: blackface is offensive to black people and it is not ever ever ever ever okay to do it.  Never.  So far this season we've seen a start dressed up in blackface as a character from Orange is the New Black, (She apologized- but she had to have known this wouldn't be okay.) then a girl standing in a picture between a guy who was dressed as George Zimmerman and a guy in black face was dressed as the teenager he shot, Trayvon Martin.  Knowing that this case had already made racial tension rise in this country, the disrespect of a white person using this dead child as a source of amusement was outrageous. Apparently to many the death of a black teenager was a source of amusement but it was not funny. Not even slightly. I've seen several other pics of people in blackface, and considering that there are still 2 days until Halloween I'm sure there will be more to come.

Yeah, some people claim to NOT know that they are being offensive, and may not have bad intentions but it is what it is.  I don't get how you wouldn't know, but apparently some people are still very sheltered and naive, or live under huge rocks, and so the last line of this blog is just for you!








So let me leave you with this.  If you ever want to know if it is okay to dress in black face, just ask the magic 8 ball:

Shooby Doo Bop I Wanna Love You Shooby Doo Bop Computer Love

Maybe I need to be thinking about something other than love because I've been writing about it a lot lately.  But I have to talk about this one.  Computer Love. Online dating. Even with the problem of catfishing going on, I tried it.  Signed up for a couple of sites.  No need for specifics or details.

Can I tell you what the issue with online dating is though? People are crazy.  Yep.  And they can't read. And the sites need better filters.  So let's get into the problems I've run into.

1) Race/Ethnicity issues.  This is where I feel like better site filters would be useful.  If my profile shows that I am black, and John Doe says he will date any race or ethnicity BUT black, why even show him to me?  I'm looking at matches, see a cute white guy.  Profile is looking great.  Then you get to what they want in a match and under race/ethnicity they've chosen white only, or they have checked every option listed but black.  That's John's preference. Good for him. But why show me someone who wouldn't even give me a second look?  That's a waste of time.

2) Religion issues.  I consider myself more spiritual than religious but I do identify as Christian.  While I respect other religions and a person's right to believe what they want, I feel like maybe someone of another religion wouldn't vibe well with me for very specific reasons.  (If you watch Love & Hip Hop think about Consequence and Jenn the Pen.  Yep.  I want to avoid stuff like that.)  So just like number 1, I need the filters to be better.

3) AGE.  It's nothing but a number they say.  BUT I have to draw a line at some point.  For some reason I attract old men.  Even though my profiles say I accept a certain age range guys who see that and are WELL over that range contact me anyway.  Sir. I'm not looking for a father figure.  I have a dad.  If something serious were to come from this (Match.com commercials say more of their users get married than any other dating site, woo hoo!) I would want kids.  And I want my kids' dad to be able to run around and play with them.  Not be sitting on the couch drinking his prune juice with his feet up because he has "the gout."  Nah homie.

4) Creeps.  Yep I attract those too! There's one guy who has messaged me at least 6 times, usually from a different account, but with the same picture- as if I wouldn't notice.  Who does this? Why do I feel like some episode of SVU was based off of your antics, sir?  Why do I keep waiting for Chris Hansen to come out and tell his creepy ass to have a seat, and offer him some tea? Why the hell are you so creepy and why do I attract creeps?

So needless to say right now I am not renewing my match.com subscription. We'll see how I feel later.

Thoughts on Love: WHERE IS IT????

In my last post, Thoughts On Love: Can you have it all?, I talked about love and whether or not I could have it all.  I have had people tell me than you can have it all, which brought up more thoughts, mainly WHERE is the love?

No. Seriously.  My bestie had to go all the way to South Korea to find love.  With less than 100 days until my 30th birthday this question plagues me daily.  WHERE is it? I mean what do I do? Do I let love find me? Do I look for it? And either way, where do I need to be? Sure some people will say "just pray about it and God will send him to you" but Billie Holiday said "God bless the child that's got his own" and I believe even when you pray for something just sitting around waiting on it won't bring it to you.  Maybe you should help him help you.

As a second year veterinary student, I spend 4-7 hours a day in a classroom.  After school? I nap and study.  I work 12 hour shifts on weekends.  So when I do have free time, I find myself trying to relax (or catch up on errands and house work).  I've never really been big on clubbing/bar hopping, and let's face it, that's not really where anyone wants to find their mate, right? I can tell you first hand that even though it seems like a good idea, finding a man at church can lead you to a headache (or a stalker. Don't ask.)  Some people have found love online but how do you know if it's for you? How do you weed out the creeps, the guys only looking for sex, and the guys could be a suspect on the next episode of SVU? How do you make sure you don't end up asking Nev and Max to prove to you that your online boo isn't a Catfish? (ok the last one is rhetorical.  The average person isn't dumb enough to become a victim like that).

I was told I could have it all, but honestly, I'm not sure how, especially with my current schedule.  I feel like I won't ever be in the right place at the right time to meet the right guy, and that makes me wonder if I should just place thoughts of love on a back burner until I'm done with school.  But that won't work either because by then I'll be 32 and I'd like to at least have some prospects y then.  So where do you find love?

130 to 30

 

According to the countdown on my phone, today marks 130 days until my 30th birthday. 30! Wow! I don't really know what it all means. I feel like I should feel something about that but I don't. Am I supposed to be excited? Happy? Sad? I am not really any of those. I just... am. 

I have done a lot of reflecting about life and my life in particular. I think that so far I haven't lived. I've merely existed. And that has to change. When 30 gets here I want to be a new me. Healthier me. Livelier me. Living and not just existing me. I want to get my passport and leave the country. I want to visit my friends who've moved away. I want to be more spontaneous. I want to worry less and have more fun. 

More fun. More excitement. I want to start out with some kind of birthday celebration but I have no idea.  I honestly haven't REALLY celebrated my birthday since I was a child. As an adult I haven't done anything big for my special day. I'm not the type to want a big party. And because my birthday is four days before Christmas it makes it hard... Some of the people I would want to celebrate with will be in their hometowns preparing to celebrate the holiday with families. Do I go on a trip? Head to Atlanta or New Orleans? And if so what do I do once I arrive? I've thought about getting a small group of friends together for a pole dancing party, dinner and drinks. Before the entire state of Florida seemed to lose its entire damn mind I wanted to go to the Harry Potter park at Universal Studios.  I also thought about getting a small group of friends together and doing a spa day. Maybe I'll figure it out soon. 

Thoughts on Love: Can You Have it All?

For a couple of years my sis and I had this conversation at various times. The topic? Can you have it all? Having it all meant getting your education and having a career, and having a loving relationship.  It felt as if our desire for careers was making our chances of finding love decline.  We'd had relationships throughout college and after, but none of them were "the one."

Now we're almost 30. She's engaged, working on another degree and her career is solid.  I'm in vet school- which takes up way too much of my time, and single. Very single.  And that's okay.  I am my favorite person to spend time with, but I do want a husband and kids one day.  One day soon.

So here's my dilemma.  My schedule right now? Hectic.  I had to work for the summer to pay for utilities, rent, groceries.  During the school year most days you spend 6-8 days in a classroom, and ideally another 3+ hours studying after school.  Weekends are generally used for errands, laundry, resting, and you got it-- more studying!  So is it even possible or logical to try to work a new relationship into that? Should I just wait until I graduate from vet school (at the age of 32) to even try to find love?  Some people say that you can have it all, just not at the same time, and if that's true that would mean putting off love for at least another 3 years.  By the time I actually met someone, dated, fell in love, got married, I'd be at or over the high risk age for pregnancy.  Right now I'm struggling over whether or not I want to specialize because that will take extra time (and money) away from my future family.

End the end, I'm probably over-thinking all of this, but anyone who knows me knows that is how I am.  But who doesn't think about this things? What person doesn't consider their future and different ways it might play out?  I guess I'll just wait and let the pieces come together on their own.

Hurricane Season: Is your pet ready?

June 1st  marks the beginning of one of my least favorite times of year, hurricane season.  Last year we had two named storms before the season officially began. Hopefully this year will bring a mild hurricane season, but being prepared is always important.

By now many people know what they'd do for themselves to prepare for this time of year. You have batteries and flashlights, a radio. You get bottled water and non-perishable food items. You keep your gas tank full in case you need to leave.  Windows are boarded and patio furniture is brought inside.  Many of us have figured out what's practical and what isn't and every year we "get ready."

But what about your pets? To most people our pets are more than just a dog that we tie up out back. They are family. And they need to be prepared for hurricane season as well.  You can go to Google and find all types of lists and tips for getting your pets ready.  I decided to share my tips, as a pet owner and life-time resident of the gulf coast, as well as an animal health professional.

1) Food.  This sounds obvious right? But think about it.  How many of you get down to the last few bites of food before heading out to the pet store to get more? How many of you have fed your pets treats or wheat bread for dinner because you were completely out of food and the pet store was closed? Don't do that during hurricane season.  Just like waiting for the last minute to get batteries, bottled water, etc will lead you to empty shelves and time spent driving all over your city in search of supplies, the same WILL happen with your pet's food.  This is especially true if your dog is on a prescription diet from your vet or eats a food that can only be found at certain stores.  Keep a smaller bag of food ready at all times so that if you have to evacuate or if you end up stuck at home for a few days, Fido and FiFi have food. Because let's face it, the humans will eat first and some of you won't be sharing your rations with the dogs.

2) Water.  Make sure your pet has plenty of fresh water to drink.  If you are evacuating, get some gallon containers and fill them up with tap water.  That way your pets can drink the water they are used to if you leave.  Some times the different additives in the water in various cities may upset your pet's stomach and quite frankly, doggy diarrhea is something you don't want to deal with while running from a storm.

3) Medication. Another obvious one, but remember, during this time, some things may be in high demand and you don't want to not have anything your pet needs.  You should stock up on flea and heartworm prevention for each pet as well as any other daily medications-- meds for pain, thyroid conditions, anxiety, seizures, etc.  If you have a pet that gets particularly nervous/anxious during storms, call your vet now to discuss getting something that can help calm them down during a hurricane or during your evacuation process.  Bottom line, God forbid a major hurricane comes through your town, you may be away from home for a while and you want to make sure your pet has any medications needed to maintain a healthy life.

4) Identification and restraint.  Every pet needs a collar with a tag that at least has your phone number.  Check tags and collars often for wear and tear so that you know they will not break when you need them.  Make sure your dog is leashed in the car ride or at a shelter.  Some shelters will allow pets but for their safety and the safety of others they will need to be leashed (and possibly crated).  Consider adding a harness for extra control and safety, as some pets can slip out of their collars easily.

 For cats (and small pets like ferrets, hedgehogs, etc) have a carrier available.  Make sure your information is located on this carrier. If you are evacuating and know where you are going, add that information as well.  Also, I have found that for my cat, it is easy to get him into this carrier because I leave it out all the time, so it doesn't just come out for trips to the vet, which could be scary.  That way if I need to get him into it quickly there isn't a struggle.

If your pet is not microchipped, this would also be a great time to think about doing so.  You'll also want to make sure that any changes in your contact info have been updated with the microchip company.

5) Vet records.  Make sure you have a copy of any vaccines your cats and dogs have received, as well as heart worm tests, fecal exam and feline combo test results.  Put them in a ziploc back and keep them with other important paperwork. 

Spoiled with a Sense of Entitlement: America's New Generation

How did we get here?

Abigail Fisher, a white student from Texas, sued the "college of her dreams" because she didn't get in.  She says she didn't get in because she was white, but her grades in comparison with those of the students admitted were mediocre. With a 3.59 GPA and a score of 1180 out of 1600 on the SAT, her credentials were far from horrible but they weren't great, and they weren't as good as the applicants she was competing with, so she didn't make the cut.  Never mind the fact that she went to another college, has since graduated, and unlike MANY other college graduates she already has a job, she deserved to get in and someone should pay!  

More recently, a set of girls at Howard University sued Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated because they weren't chosen for membership.  That's kind of the way these organizations work people.  A sorority or fraternity reserves the right to choose to whom they extend membership.  Sometimes you aren't chosen.  You go home, cry, throw something, and try again, or you just live with it.  

Let's face it.  People in American love lawsuits and petitions.  You don't get into the college of your choice, the sorority of your choice doesn't choose you, or you don't get the grade you want in a class, so you throw a tantrum and file suit, start a petition, protest.  It's life! When you were in elementary school you might not have been picked for a team on kickball day in gym. You won't always get what you want, and that is just how it is. I think part of what pisses me off is that there are people who ARE discriminated against, who won't be taken as seriously because of the way people make these frivolous gestures as often as they change clothes.  The governor of Alabama stood outside of a university to keep black students from attending, people are fighting for the right to get married, women's reproductive rights are under attack, and you want to have a bitch fit because you didn't do well enough to get into the school of your choice, were rejected by a sorority or got a bad grade? Please cry me a river, then go fall into it.  

The bottom line is this.  If you want something, work for it.  Don't feel like you are entitled to what you want in life.  

Mediocre Me

In August 2009, I was sitting in an auditorium when 95 strangers, embarking on a new journey.  My dreams had finally come true- I was in vet school. Yay me! One of the first things we heard during our orientation was the standard "look to your left, look to your right, one of these people may not be here when you graduate."  We were also reminded that even though many of us were at the top of our classes before, many of us would be at the bottom of the class in vet school.  I honestly had never heard that before, and it scared me.  Soon we met students from other classes and at some point heard what seems to be a popular vet school slogan, "C equals DVM."  In other words, grades don't really matter. Get Cs, and you will still get your DVM just like the person with straight As.  (Let's not mention the flaw in that considering that if one did get straight Cs, which equals a 2.0 grade point average, they would be below standards for most schools, but I digress.) No one wants to fail, because in vet school failing one class isn't like failing one class as an undergraduate that you get to retake.  In vet school failing one class means you aren't in vet school anymore. Now filled with the fear of being that person who would fail, I began to live by the C=DVM slogan.  Worst mistake I ever made. 

Now don't get me wrong, I was trying. I was studying. My classmate Eboni and I were often at school studying well after midnight. But for some reason, for the first time in my life, I developed test anxiety. Maybe being told that I might be one of the ones to fail was part of it.  But I went into each test more nervous than I'd been about anything in my life, thinking "if I fail this test... there are only two other exams in this class... did I study enough, etc" and I'd go in, take my seat, and my mind went blank. I'd often spend the first 20 minutes of an exam so freaked out, then have to rush to try to finish in the 40 minutes that remained.  I'd second guess myself and often ended up changing correct answers to incorrect ones.  I started having an upset stomach the day of each exam. Quite frankly after all that I was going through each exam day, "passing" was good  enough for me.  Before I knew it, Cs became a standard for me, and  I was just happy they weren't Ds or Fs, and was reminded constantly by classmates and others that C=DVM.  But it doesn't. When your test anxiety leads you to the point where you make a D and end up meeting with the academic committee, C no longer equals DVM. At that point the Cs tell them that you aren't trying hard enough, that if they gave you another chance you would still just barely scrape through.  

Once the committee dismissed me, I was angry.  I was angry at them for not understanding that I was retaining more information than my test scores showed.  The test anxiety brought my scores down but the information was there in my brain.  I was angry at myself for not seeking help with the anxiety sooner.  I was angry that I let myself get caught in a web of mediocrity knowing that I have always been the type to strive for excellence in all that I do.  I couldn't help but think 'if I'd had more As and Bs they would have been willing to give me another chance."  But at the same time I knew that because the test anxiety was there, the scores wouldn't have been where they needed to be to show the committee that I was learning and I deserved to be there. 

So I made a decision.  No more mediocre me.  I would get help with the anxiety  and remove "C equals DVM" from my mind and my vocabulary.  Cs weren't good enough for me in high school or  college, and they damn sure won't be good enough now.  Now that I've been admitted to another vet school, I finished my first semester with 1 A and 3 Bs, and I plan to do even better this semester. Being mediocre is like being at the edge of a cliff, where one mistake can cause you to plummet into the deep abyss of failure.  For some people being "good enough" is good enough, but for me it never was, and it never shall be again.  

Beauty or Brains? Why not Beauty AND Brains?

In the speech given on election night, President Obama said "Sasha and Malia, before our very eyes, you're growing up to become two strong, smart, beautiful young women, just like your mom, and I'm so proud of you."  As a daddy's girl, I can tell you that probably made their little hearts smile.

Alice Robb of The Oxonian Glabalist (which I've never heard of, by the way) felt that it was inappropriate for him to use the word "beautiful."  Read her reasoning behind this here.

Seriously, people, let's be real.  While I understand that placing too much importance on physical appearance isn't a good thing, looks do matter.  Actually, let's back up. He called them strong, smart, and beautiful.  He mentioned strength and intelligence before their beauty.  Maybe that was his way of emphasizing that the latter was not as important.  But why should little girls feel that they have to be smart OR pretty?  Why can't she have dreams of being a lawyer, physician, veterinarian, astronaut, or even the president, while at the same time thinking that she is beautiful? While I believe everyone needs to have more than just good looks, I don't think that telling someone that they have to choose between brains and beauty is just plain old stupid.

Robb says that the president's words "stung." First of all, he wasn't talking to her so fuck her feelings.  Second of all, with so many absentee fathers in the world, how dare anyone criticize this man for praising his daughters? They ARE beautiful.  And I assume with FLOTUS as a role model they are definitely strong and with two highly educated parents I know they are smart.  I just don't see what was wrong with this and why this woman feels like he should have left their looks out of it.  Those girls are gorgeous and there is nothing wrong with their father saying so! Some people need to get a life.

More Proof that This Country Doesn't Value its Woman...

The most horrifying thing I saw this Halloween wasn't a movie or costume, but a graphic about men who rape women suing for parental rights. I thought to myself "surely this is not for real."  But apparently it's true.  If a man rapes you and you become pregnant, he can sue for parental rights and visitation or even shared custody. *Insert slow blink*

That is scary as fuck to me.  I can't imagine what being raped does to you emotionally.  Then to have to deal with becoming pregnant by your rapist, and having to see him when you drop your child off for visitation, seeing him at your child's school plays, etc.  I'm sure that would be agonizing and the fact that this is even a possibility in this country is further evidence that women are undervalued here in the "great" USA.

I decided to go to Google to see what else I could find on the subject.  I found this article on CNN.  Listening to this woman talk about the emotions involved after her rape and conception of her daughter was hard for me.  My heart definitely goes out to any woman in this situation and I pray that our justice system will change these laws.

Don't Like Gay Marriage? Don't Get Gay Married!

So I get out of an exam today and log on to twitter to kill time.  I see all kinds of comments that actually had me scared to ask what was going on this time.  Then I found out what the uproar was about...a wedding between a couple of gay guys who are members of a certain fraternity.

My first thoughts? Congrats! Watched the video and the wedding looked magnificent.  Meanwhile half of the people talking about it on twitter are single as shit, at home alone on Friday nights eating Blue Bell straight from the carton.  And let's not forget about the women who are chiming in while their man is screwing his "best friend" when he claims to be out playing basketball.  At least these men had the courage to be who they are and love who they love.  What I can't understand is why so many men who claim to be "straight" are always worried about what gay people are doing.  If you don't like the same sex, good for you.  Keep it moving.  Let these folks live! Shit.

Comments on another blog went to the place people always go when talking about gay marriage-- the Bible.  Meanwhile I'm pretty sure none of them are God and none of them have a hell to put anyone in so their opinions might as well just shut up because I'm sure if I opened their closets all types of skeletons would fall out.  I don't believe God hates gay people, I don't believe it is a "sin," or that a person will be condemned to hell for loving someone of the same sex-- but that's all for another post.

So let me just end by saying CONGRATULATIONS to Robert & Nathanel and I hope that they have a wonderful life together.

Neighbor Wars: Don't Start None Won't Be None

This ain't Mr. Rogers' neighborhood.

I recently moved into a duplex.  Pets are allowed, I paid my pet fee.  I got a not from my neighbor a couple of weeks ago stating that my dogs howl when I leave and that he works at night and sometimes works from home and is unable to sleep or get any work done.

As a former 3rd shift worker I feel his pain-- to an extent.  My dogs, Carlton and Beaux, both have separation anxiety.  When I leave Carlton howls and Beaux does his best to be like his big brother (Poor thing his "howl" sounds more like the pitiful cries of an alley cat).  Let it be known that while they do howl when I leave they generally settle down after 10-15 minutes and sleep, but they will bark if someone knocks on the door, as they are good watch dogs and quite frankly that's their damn job.  I did acknowledge his note and made efforts to try to muffle the sound.  I put Carlton in another bedroom with the door closed.  It was very inconvenient for me to have to drag his crate into my room each morning, and out of my room each day when I returned home.  Carlton can't be trusted out of his crate and I'd come home to all of my things torn up so this had to be done.  I tried putting them in my kitchen, which is upstairs and on the far wall-- so he was as far as possible from my neighbor's bedroom.

So now to the second note from my neighbor.  He said that the noticed a difference but then proceeded to tell me there "are other things that can be done to keep a dog from howling."  Well enlighten me motherfucker! I've worked with animals for over 7 years now and have been dealing with Carlton's separation anxiety since I got him as a 3 month old puppy and he is 5 now.  But I am sure that he's way more qualified than I am to deal with this.  I refuse to drug my dogs for his benefit so if that is what his suggestion is, he can kiss my ass as well as theirs.

I decided not to even reply to the second note, because my mean side would have responded, not my nice side.  Well as it turns out my neighbor has issues of his own.  Not sure if it was him or his roommate but they are noisy as hell! Sounds like they are trying to knock the building down.  I said I was also going to let that slide but then I heard a barking dog.  Wait one damn minute.  You are complaining about my dog's noise and you have a noisy dog of your own?  After I didn't hear the dog anymore I felt like maybe I was just hearing things, but then I almost stepped in a pile of dog shit the size of Omaha on my half of the yard.  I told myself not to even get worked up about it because a stray dog could have done it or a dog who was being walked by an irresponsible owner... until this morning, when one of the guys's girlfriend drives up and lets a dog out of her car, off leash who was doing whatever the hell it wanted.

So I finally decided I would reply to his last note.  Asked him to enlighten me on his "ways to keep a dog from howling." I also added that he and his roommate (and the girlfriend) make their own fair share of noise. I also let him know that I'd appreciate it if they didn't let that dog poop on my half of the yard (or at least pick it up) and that I have heard the dog barking.  I am not complaining at all about the dog at all.  As a dog owner I understand that just like children, no dog will be quiet 100% of the time.  I just ask that they keep the poop out of my half of the yard and remember that while they are complaining about my noise they are making noise of their own.  Hopefully this is enough for him to leave me the hell alone, but if not, we can make this into an all out war and I guarantee he is not ready.

No Sparkle for Me...

... at least not this weekend.

I love being Black. It has it's ups and downs but I'm glad to be a Black woman. There are some times, however, when my people act up and I want to check that box that says Pacific islander or Alaskan native. Viewing a movie with a predominantly black cast in theaters is one of those times.

Let's take a trip down memory lane.  Picture it, Mobile, 2006. My two best friends at the time and I went to see the Dreamgirls on opening night with our mothers.  The women behind us can only be described as ratchet. They talked, cackled likenhens and complained the entire length of the film. I guess no one had told them that Dreamgirls was a musical (I wonder how one can pay to see a movie without knowing a little bit about it, not to mention it is a remake).  About halfway through the movie they got really fed up withbthe singing.  When a song started there was a large, dramatic sigh, followed by "oh Lord they singing AGAIN?" or "not ANOTHER song."

I hate that. I don't pay almost $12 for a movie plus up to $6 for the snacks I get beforehand at Walgreens (don't judge me) to have to listen to women cackle, complain, and just be loud and inconsiderate during a movie. You guys have fun at the movie tomorrow. I will be waiting a couple of weeks and I will go to the first showing on a Sunday while all the black churches are waiting for their pastor to finish that sermon.

Honey, I'm home!

For just over a week I have been in my new place.

Moving day was a complete clusterfuck. It started with my parents and I spending almost an hour looking for my cat Purrrcy. There were issues with the movers, rain, and the a/c was broken when we got here- but we made it.

One of my major concerns about the move was whether or not the boys would have trouble adjusting. The duplex is split level and I was unsure of how they would handle the stairs.  Purrrcy settled right in. He runs up and down the stairs like a maniac (and will hopefully lose weight).  Carlton went up the stairs like a champ. Coming down was another story. He made it down two steps before deciding it was safer to just stay upstairs. Beaux was scared going up but ran down.  In the week we've been here they have both conquered their fears and settled in nicely.

I'm still unpacking and trying to get things organized but everything is coming along nicely and i am ready for my new beginning!

Justice for Trayvon: Post-racial America? Yeah Right

Let me start by mentioning that a few weeks ago, a video went viral about a guy named Kony.  A guy who'd been doing bad things for a while but for some reason it became hip and trendy to call for justice now.  Some people "attacked" others for sharing and being outraged. While I always feel like people don't pay enough attention to home, I defended those supporting this cause, mainly because I felt like a lot of the folks complaining about them probably don't get involved in issues here in America or anywhere for that matter.

Then I start reading news articles about Trayvon Martin.  He was a 17 year old walking home with some candy and a can of tea when a self-appointed neighborhood watch leader shot him, claiming self defense.  The 911 call has been released, and although I have not yet been able to bring myself to listen to it, I'm told that one can hear the young boy pleading for his death before he was shot.  (Click here to hear the tape/read the transcription.)  The killer, George Zimmerman was never arrested.

My question is where is the outcry for Trayvon?  The Change.org petition to have this man prosecuted has struggled to reach 300k signatures, and is still around 25,000 signatures away from the goal.  Many people who changed their Facebook status messages, pictures and posted links about Kony have said nothing about Trayvon.  Where is his viral video? Where are the protests and the blogs and the trending topic on twitter?

People keep claiming that racism is dead.  Our president is a black man after all! Of course racism doesn't exist anymore! Being born and raised in southern Alabama, I see daily that these statements are false.  I don't think racism will ever be gone.  This young man's life was taken and no one seems to care.  Our people are constantly being treated as second class citizens in this country and it needs to stop.  Black parents should not be fearful of letting their children go outside because a trigger-happy neighbor with a gun and a prejudice against their skin tone may shoot them.

People, we need to wake up.